Wait... January is HOW many months away from May?

Okay, 2014. Here we are.

I am panicking.

I'm going to make a list of all the wedding things we still need to do and take a picture of it so you can enjoy my panic as well.

In addition to all this, I need to lose about 30 pounds (okay, 15), get my dress altered (both of those in the next two weeks, definitely not happening, which leaves me with the option of being unhappy with how heavy I am on my wedding day in a dress that fits, or getting back to a weight I'm happy with and looking crummy in a dress that doesn't fit), clean the bathroom, do the laundry that has been building up for the past month, remember to not eat junk or eat after 7 pm, come up with some goals for work and accomplish the heck out of them, learn to can things, wash Beorn's gross favorite toy, and somehow chill the eff out.

So I'll be over here, breathing into a paper bag while I send yet another email to one of the dozen vendor reps who hasn't replied to me all week.

Seriously. If this wedding is anywhere near not-a-disaster, it'll be like that time the Millennium Falcon showed up to catch Luke under cloud city. A small, beautifully-lit miracle.