It would seem that I can't win.

Happy May, everyone!

No, we're going to make a list of good things first:

1) I am wearing leggings for pants right now. This is a good thing as they are very comfortable, but I feel a little like Lindsay Lohan. I think I'll be okay as long as I don't go outside in them and pretend they are actual pants.
2) I had pickles and cheese for dinner. Nutritious? No. Delicious? Yes.
3) Bram Stoker's Dracula is on sale at Target for $5 right now! I got it yesterday before I realized my car is actually still broken. It's a very silly movie, but I like it. It's got the Oldman factor, which goes a long way and in fact completely overrides the Keanu Reeves factor. And then there is the Tom Waits factor - sprinkles on a cupcake, Tom Waits is. One thing you may not know about me is that I went through a pretty ridiculous vampire phase in middle school during which I read little other than Anne Rice and anything else I could find with vampires in it. I think everybody has a literary phase they're not tremendously proud of - that was mine.
4) Speaking of vampires, this sparkly lotion makes me feel like Alice Cullen! More sparkles!
5) My car is very clean. I finally took all the stuff out of it (this was a lot of stuff - a LOT of stuff) yesterday and while it doesn't work, it looks nice.
6) Tomorrow is Friday and I get to leave work at noon due to working last Saturday. Hooray! If I don't drive to see The Boyfriend I will take the car to a fix-it place and then take a nap on my couch.
7) The Office and 30 Rock were new today. Yay!
8) I do not know anyone who has the swine flu. Back, Captain Trips, back! I'm not worried until I see Randall Flagg. It is, however, fun to blame problems on the swine flu. I think my car may have it, as did the networked printers at work this morning.


The book, naturally, about eight thousand times better. Stu Redman was one of my first literary crushes. SHUT UP STU IS THE MAN.

9) Keanu just leaned out the side of the carriage and asked, "I say, is the Castle Aarrrrrrgh?"


Oh no, I rewound it and he actually asked if the castle is far. Bummer. "Perhaps he was dictating!"

That's a little better. It's hard to be too upset when the legendary Black Beast of Argh is in the picture.